Unfortunately, the dating scene is getting worse as time passes by. Just as people get accustomed to the idea of ghosting, a new and more toxic trend has arrived: ghostlighting. Ghostlighting is a combination of “ghosting” and “gaslighting,” and leaves victims confused the most, and questioning their reality.
With ghostlighting, someone suddenly and without any notice, stops all communication. Then, without any warning, the person resumes communication as if nothing occurred. If the person is confronted, the ghostlighter tries to justify their silence by saying they were “giving you space” or you appeared “too busy.” This toxic new dating trend ghostlighting adds a psychological dimension to a new form of avoidance.
Ghostlighting Trend’s Ghostlighting Trend
Ghostlighting has many forms in today’s society. Off the top of my head, someone may start a conversation or like a couple posts of yours on social media. Typically, they attempt to resume communication like they never left. Ghostlighting is the latest toxic dating trend.
Online dating has destigmatized breaking up. Ambiguity allows for an out, which is spot on. Ghostlighters want to use distortion so you think you haven’t been ghosted. This is what makes ghostlighting more dangerous than simply being ignored.
How To Know If You Are Ghostlighted
In any relationship, actions speak louder than words. Dating coaches recommend measuring people’s actions more than words. Is communication regular? Do they show up when they say they will? If so, they are out. If they appear out of the blue, it is a huge red flag.
It is vital that you address the problem. You should simply describe the phenomenon. Explain that you interpreted their absence as disinterest. Observe how they respond. An honest person will sincerely apologize. If they dismiss your feelings or shift responsibility, they are ghostlighting you.
Coping With the Pain and Moving On
It is detrimental to become a victim to this phenomenon, and falling prey to it is distressing. However, there is no point in solving the riddle. You lack the respect to warrant self-blame. Experts suggest that rather than wasting time trying to deduce what the other person is thinking, concentrate on your feelings.
A vicious cycle in bad relationships is broken when you come to terms with what their actions spoke. Set your boundaries, and determine what you will or will not accept in the future. If you are the one ghosting, own it. Honesty and directness cleans up the dating culture for everyone.
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